For those of you that do not know, one of the goals of the Peace Corps is, “to help promote a better understanding of other people on part of Americans.” I also think its common knowledge that on average Americans are pretty ethnocentric. I recall one time overhearing a conversation between two friends on the train where Ignorant Friend No. 1 asked Ignorant Friend No. 2 , “Spanish speakers think in English though, right?” … Cause like, what type of mind blowing savagery would keep someone from submitting to the omnipotent powers of the English language?
And as I started to tell people that I’ll be serving in Peru, I realized that for the most part I received pretty much the same responses from people. A response along the lines of, “Oh Cool! You get to see Machu Picchu” or “I’ve always wanted to go to Machu Picchu!” Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m trynna be all up in that lost and found city too but I got the feeling that most people don’t know much about Peru beyond the famed Incan ruin. So I took it upon myself to ask random people questions about Peru when I had the chance Jay Leno Jay Walking Style. Needless to say, it was laughs on laughs on laughs. Here are some of the best responses.
Q1: What is the official name of Peru?
“Ummm I’m going to go with the standard Republic of Peru but if that’s wrong can I give you a back up answer?”
“If its not the Republic of Peru, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that its got Simon Bolivar’s name in it.”
A1: The Republic of Peru
Q2: What is the Capital City of Peru?
“I don’t know but if I had to make the capital be somewhere it would definitely be Machu Picchu.”
“Don’t you think that might be problematic?”
“Yeah, on second thought that might not pan out because its empty and made of stones.”
A2: Lima, Peru, “The City of Kings”
Q3: How big is Peru?
“I’m gonna give it [the size of] Texas. Texas is big. Everything is big in Texas.”
A3: Peru is approximately three times the size of California. Everything is bigger in Peru.
Q4: What is the climate like in Peru?
“Its all over the place cause doesn’t it have mountains and stuff? But then it has jungles and stuff too.”
And for all you Star Wars fans there was this gem: “I’d say the climates gotta be like Endor — a lot of trees, a lot of Ewoks and sh*t.”
A4: The climate on the coast is subtropical with very little rainfall. The Andes mountains observe a cool-to-cold climate with rainy summers and very dry winter. The eastern lowlands present an Equatorial climate with hot weather and rain distributed all year long.
Q5: What are the two official languages of Peru?
“Spanish and sure, whatever, lets just say Peruvian cause it aint Portuguese.”
A5: Spanish and Quechua
Q6: What is Peru like?
“Pan flute bands. I saw on South Park there’s giant gerbils and pan flute bands.”
A6: I’ll let you know when I get there in August.